You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
there's got to be a less slutty way to tell him the baby isn't his
i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
Judging by the grocery store, everyone stocked up on frozen pizza and beer for the blizzard. If our generation ever faces doomsday, we'll go out smiling.
Just got the orientation leader spot. For the first two days, I will be one of the best looking guys on campus. The freshman girls will be so disappointed they settled for me when everyone else comes back.
he drunkenly pissed himself on the deck, in the bathroom, and on my couch within the span of an hour
its like an avodart commercial...maybe he has a growing problem
I wish there was a classy way to show off your boobs.
Just picture a dyson vacuum with razor blades. That's how it felt.
Leave the bottle at home cause either way I'm not taking another shot. You have no idea how long it took me to compose this text free of grammatical error.
Gold star for you, but I'm on my way and the soco is buckled in next to me. This is happening.
I just farted in the bathroom and the guy in the stall next to me started gagging. Its a beauitful day
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
They were so sore! Either I have bed bugs or you were biting my nipples last night and don't lie to me.
He texted me "sup", so I sent him that gif of the surprised guy and apparently it offended him
Theres about 23 grilled cheese sandwiches stuck to my ceiling and tomato soup all over the kitchen. You are never allowed over again. Ever.
Randomize
