I think your mom looks like a breed of donkey and elephant, but her boobs are perfect
Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
I wish I only lived at night.
he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
i cant cry in cvs. not again.
I had a dream that our used condom started talking to me. I told me that I did an amazing job, and told me that it saved me. From aids.
The horrors my penis has endured I wouldn't wish upon any man.
You stuck your entire fist into a full jar of peanut butter and starting assaulting people
Jen gave my number to some guy she met in NY. He sent me a picture of his weiner. He had nice shoes. I replied with a pic of bacon.
When in doubt always reply with bacon.
After my date left I rallied and took the Asian girl home. Flexibility my friend.
They have beer where we have blood.
Any idea why my ass cheeks are bruised again?
The fact that theyre bruised AGAIN means you're not adult enough to know why.
I woke up with a captain's hat on my desk.
I don't want to spend an inordinate amount of time with you, I want to have sex with you. Duhhhhhh.
Randomize
