Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
Oh my god. I just envisioned myself eating panda meat. I need to get out of this class.
He looks like the kind of guy that still collects pokemon cards
i just watched kanye west and taylor swift have a chugging contest. why cant halloween be every day
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
my hip hurts so fuckin bad. and I just found a half eaten burrito in my nightstand drawer.
OMG OMG OMG DID YOU KNOW THERE ARE MINI CHOCOLATE COWBOY HATS THAT MEN CAN BUY FOR THEIR PENISES?
So looks like I applied to adopt a dog last night. I'm completely ok with this
I think I'm going to contact pbr and see if they'll sponsor our dreams
So hungover. I'm getting too old for trolloping around in disco shorts going shot for shot with well behaved underclassmen in an effort to lure them to the dark side of alcoholism and liver failure.
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
Company sent me first class out of state, got so drunk on the plane I started handing out pillows and blankets to the people in coach
WHY THE FUCK DID I HAVE TO FALL IN LOVE WITH A CONVICT
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
dad says come back and get the lawn mower out of the pool before mom gets home
Randomize
