I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
apparently i traded the tiffany necklace my mom bought me for 2 shots and next in line for beer pong at the frat.
we hooked up on one of my student's desks last night...i can't decide if i'm ashamed or massively proud of myself
dude you teach first grade wtf
i looked up his schedule, waited outside his classroom, and handed him the receipt for plan b
Note to self not a good idea to try and make out with a girl when she's crying over her boyfriend
There's a good chance a guy sucked off my right earring last night
He purred while eating me out. HE PURRED AND I LIKED IT.
posting about faith hill is really not helping you get me into your bed
They kept barging in on us saying random shit. At one point they came in yelling room service! and threw soda at us bruising my foot. Weirdest injury I have gotten during sex.
The lady that was sitting beside me thought the best way to cheer herself up was to pet and ruffle my hair while crying and telling me her problems...
You really need to not quote Anchorman while I'm giving you a serious blowjob.
He kept saying "i'm lost" while he was sitting on his couch...
Listen all I know is that mistakes were made and she stole the car and drove half an hour for food at 4 am
There. There is gum on my butt cheek IT IS NOT MINE
Randomize
