are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
the beds are so narrow its like a jenga threesome
is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
It wouldn't have been a big thing. If anything, I woulda apologized to you and cleaned the remote
i'm gonna start fucking more girls with asthma. help feed my ego.
I believe its time to stop celebrating Thanksgiving. I've been drunk for over a week. If my liver doesn't give out, and I'm not pregnant I will truly have something to be thankful for.
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
Tried to ride the mechanical bull pants less, got punched for making out with some lesbians wife, and you tipped the bartender with a can of skoal.
I regret nothing
I want Samuel L. Jackson to stand beside me and narrate my morning shits.
I came so hard I burst a blood vessel in my eye. If i cant marry this girl, I'm gonna have to switch teams.
...and that is the first time I've ever wished fewer naked women on someone I like.
So you were shitfaced and stole a fucking kayak?
Sexting just isn't as much fun once you learn how bad he is in bed...
Gonna try and have sex in the empire state bldg, will tell you how it goes
its hard to say precisely how it happened, but the next thing i knew i was on top of a mountain
Randomize
