Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.
I think I deserve the nobel peace prize for discovering that one should smoke before drinking instead of drinking before smoking.
got them to do a wheelbarrow of shame down the sidewalk after the threesome. I rule
Just pulled my keys, cell-phone and a pack of cigarettes out from between my cleavage. This one guy's face was priceless.
You brought back some girl with you at 3am and introduced her to everyone as "hot pocket"
People are suprisingly accepting of someone doing a walk of shame in a toga...
Is snow just God skeeting all over the place??
Yes. Yes it is.
New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'
If I had a dick as big as yours. The world would be an oyster. An oyster smaller than my big penis
I got head this morning from the 31-year-old version of Jenn. It was like a blow job from the future while a simultaneous blast from the past for 10 minutes.
Don't remember anything. Melissa just said I kept saying welcome to the bat cave
Told him my main goal was to seduce the man and convince him to leave his wife for me. He didn't argue just asked me to let him know if I succeeded so he didn't waste anymore time not sleeping with the secretary at his office. I have an incredible boyfriend.
Quick, I need a picture of your dick. Don't ask questions, just show me your genitals.
COVER ME IN BACON THATS MY FETISH
ACTUALLY ITS NOT, I HAVE NO FUCKING IDEA WHAT AWAKENS THE MONSTER BELOW THE BELT
its like i get a dick upgrade with every new guy i screw, at this rate i'm scared to see my next one
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