I overheard a kid saying to his mom at Walmart: "Mommy.. should we buy cups for daddy's spit?"
she had a pic of herself in a bikini as the wallpaper on her iPhone... I'm sensing a Tyra banks kinda girl. shit.
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
Dude cabbage spilt on the floor, and now danielles rolling it. Happy st party's day.
Dude I introduced the hot Russian girl to the hot Ukrainian girls. I am a UN ambassador
The look on the dr's face when she asked me the last time i had sex and i responded "like an hour and a half ago" ... priceless
This isn't a because its valentines day booty call, it's a because your cock is phenomenal booty call that happens to be on valentines day..
We decided to keep having sex while I ordered the pizza. I wanted extra pepperoooooooooooooni.
I don't know, but I assume drunk me had her reasons. I trust her judgement.
If I had a dollar for every straight boy that questioned their sexuality because of me, I would live a comfortable middle-class life.
It is 5:00PM and I'm just now putting on underwear.
Will you skip merrily into hell with me?
I wanted one last NYC adventure and I got it. Now I just have to figure out a polite way to wake up the pantless former stripper illegal Russian immigrant street violinist chick currently in a vodka coma in my bed.
Is it normal for a guy to send you a dick pic along with “He misses you”
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