like if someone fucked a dictionary but instead of having a penis, it was just one of those leap frog educational toys
I hope to god you are high
It was like what a highfive between zeus and Jesus would sound like
about to try to wax my asshole... wish me luck
tell me how a rose bowl party involves waking up to find a raccoon in my kitchen cabinet eating my oreos the next morning?
it's official, i've been high in 26 different states, and three different countries.
dude she looked like Newman from Seinfeld I'm done with this wingman shit
I fucked her and then she made me sleep on the floor next to her bed because she 'has a committment problem'
You ordered 6 boxes of pizza and laughed in the pizza guys face when you didn't pay for any of them.
She swung at the pinata with crutches
Hardly remember what he looks like and the man has seen me passed out spread eagle. I begin this journey with such a disadvantage.
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
I guess your brother-in-law will have his day in the sun tonight after you leave. By that, I of course, mean he's gonna suck liquor milk out your sister's tits.
I vaguely remember us chasing shots by licking each other's faces last night. Our friendship has reached another level completely.
Who the fuck gets injured on a merry-go-round? HOW IS IT POSSIBLE??
I just accidentally deep throated a popsicle in front of my parents
Randomize
