You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
yo i just woke up i feel so weird, and the absolut is still fill, so is the 30, what the fuck did we drink last night man? And will you please come out of the bathroom.
Bro... we didn't even hang out last night??
I would go down on you faster than GM stock
its 4:30 pm. In the mall. Just threw up into my hands. I love Vegas and Vegas loves me
who knew that a girl that let me piss on her within 20 minutes of meeting her would get upset i couldn't remember her name.
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
We simultaneously blacked out then simultaneously came to then simultaneously had sex with the neighbors. We're definitely meant to be roommates.
Dude I am not desperate enough to pay my dealer in change. Maybe tomorrow.
Well. I have your keys. You have my car. Looks like we have a drunkxican standoff.
A man that refers to my vagina in third person is a man after my own heart.
Jill you already won the game by finding a dude who will fuck you in flamingo knee socks. Theres no hope for the rest of us
I just realized that every possible way I walk to campus I walk by the house of someone I slept with
What do you expect from her? Do you remember that creepy man she dated who saturated a pillowcase in his musky cologne and mailed it to her and she still slept with him.
I told my therapist about the other night and he actually whistled and said "wow that is not good."
Randomize
