I don't know how I got that girl last night. I feel like seal right now sans the scars
I glued a penny on the door Tricia believes its Patrick Swayze haunting our apartment. Fuckin potheads.
I love that the power of margaritas brought us back together.
that's why you don't digest questionable powders from girls wearing tutus at a dirty club
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
Found myself carrying 2 bottles of .89 euro wine about half a mile to where im staying. and someone stopped me and spoke to english. apparently, i reek of drunk american.
At 4 am, making my walk of shame, the hotel security followed me to my car with his flashlight shined directly on me. I felt like either a criminal or like I was about to get raped. Can't a girl sneak out of a hotel room without an actual spotlight on her?!?!?!
WHAT IF you could get pizza delivered to you IN YOUR CAR while driving somewhere. Like moving roadside service.
You're High aren't you?
Sooooo high
We're 17 hours into a 3 day weekend, and he's already shitfaced. He fell of the dock TWICE and insisted on wearing a life jacket on dry land.
My life is a joke. Told everyone last night that they could call me Mrs. McCormick because I'm gonna end up alone with a handle of peach vodka anyways.
On the upside, no one went to the hospital! Lex's friend was definitely on fire at one point last night though because he tried to juggle tiki torches. He was shirtless this morning and smelled like a BBQ.
You were so stoked after landing that flip that you dropped acid with three random guys without hesitation
Can't tell if waking up covered in easy mac is the sign of an amazing or terrible night
Waking up next to a guy you don't remember going home with and the first thing you say is: where is my tiara? = successful birthday
what do u think we would be doing right now if we were together
Urinating on unicorns
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