Booty call?
Dude you don't even follow my twitter
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
Call me in 2 minutes and go along with what I say. You're hysterical and I must go comfort you asap. He just asked if I was ready to experience sex with a wizard and he wasnt kidding.
you threw up in someones recycling bin and left a note apologizing. how drunk do you think you were?!
finding my wedding ring encrusted in vomit this morning really just topped off last night...
I feel like I bought a front row ticket to watch her screw up her life
I just withdrew $200 in ones. I think the teller knew what was up
Making jello shots drunk, i apologize ahead of time if they are too strong Can't taste anything.
You know me. Don't need roses, just dick and food.
Oh God! I'm naked from the waist down playing records. Too drunk. I don't even know what to do.
Balls out but with a shirt on. Eating ravioli. I don't know how to deal with this.
Between the hair pulling and the choking its its more like combat than sex
Sorry I have an "Operation Iraqi Freedom" fantasy
This family outing has commenced with me throwing up in an apple orchard
he force fed me pizza, ripped my clothes off, almost broke the couch, and actually broke my nose. it was a good night, i'd say 😂
Told him I just wanted to be friends. He responded, "The best marriages are born from great friendships." Please come get me.
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
Randomize
