he thought i was passed out so he proceeded to jerk off while i lay on the floor next to him
No stitches, just platelets and will power
the way she shouted out instructions during sex made me feel like I was having sex with my gym teacher
Just mindlessly walked into the mens bathroom. My vagina has now become its own independent being, looking for penises. I'm just along for the ride.
Almost propositioned sex in exchange for a study guide for my final tomorrow.
I have vomit stuck in my nose, you should come with a warning label.
Shots. Renamed a guy (he looked like a Scott to me), running, bloody Marys, walk to Safeway, donuts, ride home from someones husband, Nurse Jackie. FIN.
I'm hoping my engineering degree will pay off when I invent porn watching in the shower
My dad just accidentally taught me how to make fake IDs. I love my life.
Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman
When you woke up the first word out of your mouth was "whoa"
I was feeling the aftermath of his penis
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
He just showed up in boxer briefs and loafers with only his phone and condoms
I ate too many pot brownies and passed out topless with my boobs painted like the American flag
If you're with any of them tell them i apologize for (insert whatever i did here)
Randomize
