wtf he couldnt undo my bra, i asked him if it was his first time and he said "with a girl? yeah"
Is there a nice way of saying 'touch my penis or i dont really wanna hangout"?
I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
This weekend was suppose to be a 'smoke weed and stare at things' weekend. Not a 'spend all my rent money partying with Europeans till 8 am' weekend
Yeah but those French chicks did get naked
I was an emotional waste case that night. She made me stroke her ponytail.
random memory from the wedding, the bartender show us how to open the windows of the hotel and pee out of them
Its okay that he doesn't remember you, he only remembers girls by their boobs and I think you were wearing a jacket
Idk but she keeps giving me s'mores and I'm having a hard time caring about her alcoholism because of it
Nothing says summer like lemonaid, but nothing says fuck yeah summer like lemonaid and vodkavodka
In other news, last night I told somebody they made eczema look so good they should call it sexzema.
Is it bad that I'm tindering right now? I'm naked on his couch while he's slaving over legal documents for work. And he doesn't have cable, so what else am I supposed to do?
I JUST WANTED TO GET SOME MOTHER FUCKING TACOS I AM SINGLE AS FUCK TACOS BRING PREOPLE TOGETHER OKAY
Because, after all, nothing quite says life in 2020 than doing laundry at 9:40 on a Friday morning to make sure you have masks and underwear.
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