butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
took 5 apple pie shots. caution: flames. not digestable.
just so you know, your brother isn't driving home wasted tonight. he is, instead, in my dorm shower screaming about rubbing his butt with my loofah; thought you would be proud
this isnt the person you just texted but i have her phone. she disappeared when the bacon came home and she hasn't returned since.
I can't believe he would be such an ass
Your boobs are way too big for you to be worrying about anything.
we made malted milkshakes. malt as in malt liqour.
you were sitting on your bed looking out the window, rocking back and forth naked, saying how peaceful it looked outside
You don't have to believe me. My vagina knows it happened.
Please be advised that because of last year's "incident" we will no be starting St. Pat's day with spicy breakfast burritos and car bombs. Please plan accordingly.
We turned a watering can into a margarita bong.
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
also somebody did cough syrup and i was really worried but i couldn’t express why properly so i was like MACKLEMORE SAYS NO
I need time to grow out my leg hair and not be sad anymore
We were like one big happy Eskimo family.
Damn, I just did coke with a dude in a bathroom and after he took his dick out right in front of me and took a piss. What a power move.
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