D3 body, D1 cock
I feel like I've been hit by a train. I woke up this morning covered in wine, free condoms, and a sign language dictionary.
I knew something was wrong when santa got arrested
i didn't know falling asleep in the tbell line could get you a dui. Isn't everyone there stoned or drunk?
Ok, so for future reference, in Rome, "piano bar" means "brothel".
If you bring me a slurpee and advil I will eat you out for like an hour.
I was really sad when you left and cried. And i don't know what a face promise is, but apparently i made you make one.
It's just a matter of time. The ball is in my court. Soon to be in her mouth.
Chances are I'll be there for your wedding. Camelbaks filled with jack and coke are appropriate attire, right?
definitely not taking the whole return culture shock so well...drinking a 100 proof rootbeer vodka float out of a german beer mass
No. More. Tequila. Even the hot dog guy felt bad for me and you know that guy has seen some crazy shit.
When he pulls out of you and farts and says ahh I wanted to do that for the past 30 mins ....you rethink the next drunken hook up
why is there a chinchilla in our apartment, and where did it come from?
question nothing. DON'T QUESTION A FREE CHINCHILLA.
Mid stroke she told me she'd had bigger. Replied I could tell. Sex ended right at that moment.
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
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