Having sex with the stobe light on was the best bad idea I've ever had.
you were chalanging people to drink the "worlds biggest jager bomb" - a VASE of Redbull and a PINT of Jager... is it no wonder you dont remember anything?
If I say "It's good enough" and I'm not talking about a sandwhich, that's your queue to stop me, you're supposed to be my friend.
Does he not understand that naked slip and slide needs supervision after dark?!
constantly striving to make life awkward and more complicated, one drunk bone at a time.
BTW my friend remembers her as "the one with the pronounced chin"
Ok, it's starting to sound like someone's out there trying to learn to play the trombone while breaking kitchenware.
But the drunk streaking fizzled when one of jake's friends took a piss while running with a massive erection.
Shirtless guy staggering down the sidewalk, puking into a Prada shopping bag. Ahhh, the walk of shame in Boystown.
dude there's a blind guy on the trail using his service dog to hit on girls.
It probably would have happened but I just can't picture myself losing my virginity while laying on top of his Quiksilver duvet set.
he had a beard, sexy nerd glasses and kept referring to his penis as 'this dick' its like jesus was saving my perfect match for my prime
Do they sell "congrats in losing your virginity!" cards and do they come in gay?
Plus my dignity needs a night alone with me.... Oh that's right. I lost it last night
Well I didn't spend $7 on an Uber just to get limp dick
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