nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
you scanned your fake to get into the dorm last night and when the lady told you it was the wrong card you looked at her and said this is who i am thursday night
he is literally lying on the floor eating cookies. doing nothing. and as i was hitting him he needed to protect the cookies more than himself.
You missed a lot. I drank contact solution thinking it was water, vodka thinking it was water and some unidentified substance that reminded me of pine sol thinking it was water..
I wonder what my nutrition professor is going to think when I have to put 21 keystone lights, a bottle of merlot wine, and 5 rum and cokes and 4 shots of tequila on my dietary analysis
thanks so much for stopping me from telling him i want to have sex with him while i proceeded to hookup with the air.
Grilled cheese and whiskey for lunch is why i should NEVER be a housewife.
why is my underwear the only thing i was wearing that smells like vodka?
What a dumb baby whore.
I have cum and leaves all over me. Don't ask questions.
Kriste-san. Brian-sensai going to sleepy times acturry. Kriste-grasshopper will spend fun-fun times with Brian-sensai and glorious redbox movie tomorrow yes?
Most creative movie date proposition... ever.
I'm having post-experience "why didn't I fuck her in a public bathroom" regrets
It has gotten to a point where I just want to sit on his face. Less butterflies, more orgasms.
You don't know how skeptical I was about letting a guy with braces go down on me
You are, as of last night, the self declared king of pooping. Long may you reign.
Randomize
