office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
Everytime she would start slurring, she'd stop, hold up a finger, wait like 30 seconds, then try again. I love drunk people
Last night must have been awesome, my dog still smells like vomit.
This is the prime rib incident all over again
This flask doesn't match my outfit. I hope the gays don't mind.
It was like she tried to cover up all the weight she gained with a fake tan...
So i'm in a museum and theres a punch bowl from 1765 with a picture of 3 men forcing the 4th to drink the punch bowl. Colonial hazing
What's worse: not calling my parents in Dallas to make sure they're alright or not taking shelter to masturbate all over my douchebag roommates clothes?
I worry about you.
I didn't even realize I grinded on a security guard last night. Shit. Did he at least like it?
Reached a new low last night. Passed out. With my pants down. On the toilet. At ihop. Waitress had to wake me up.
Hungover in church. I can feel stained glass Jesus judging me.
I unknowingly motorboated my boyfriend's ex-gf last night. Yay me!
I'm storing dick pics, so basically if I'm still single after residency...ur gonna get bombarded. It's gonna be a blizzard of dicks.
Feel free to keep your blizzard of dicks to yourself.
My liver has officially said "fuck this shit" and escaped from my body.
You sent me a pic of you peeing in two separate directions
and like half a dozen dick pics
Randomize