hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
I woke up this morning under my fitted sheet and my legs through the sleeves of my sweater.
fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
If God's watching us, we might as well be entertaining
We planned for the zombie apocalypse. In great detail. Of course there was booze involved.
Get the fuck buddy a birthday present or not? He def deserves one, but how do I explain the debit card charge to my husband?
I have now added draft and wells specials that different bars have to my blackberry calendar.. Help me.
With me living this close to Mexico now, Tequila is just a geographical choice at this point if nothing else.
Actually, what with the curvature of the Earth, it's faster to leave from Washington. And Google maps recommends kayaking instead of swimming.
Vague recollection of me ripping your shirt off at the bar... I hope I asked first, otherwise that's real rude.
You have not lived until you have drunkenly grinded on your mother. Daughter of the year right here.
Your mother liked my album on facebook that's only filled with drunk pictures. I don't know what to feel about this
he said "be careful" then handed me a cheezit...
I mean like, I missed 30 minutes of star wars to fuck you on Christmas so you must be worth something
Just had someone from Hells Angels snort coke off my tits...so I'm pretty much done with life now. 💀
Randomize
