I can handle NPR. I speak hippie. I took it in college.
He bought me flowers. The card with it said: Sorry I cant get you off. I will try harder.
If we could never, ever tell mike i pissed in his closet, that would be really really great
No, i went to get it done but the guy couldnt find it. exhibit A of why i wanted a clit piercing in the first place.
your drunk ass trust falled a guy double fisting bud limes and as a result your head bounced off the patio table. So that might explain the stitches on the back of your head.
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
Just so you know, a 6'7" tall gay man, with a martini in one hand and a fairy wand in the other, is not a force to be reckoned with...don't ask.
Question: should I be considering heels or is this the kind of night where I should plan on falling on my face regardless of my choice of footwear?
You know it's last call at a gay bar when the guys at the urinal are just jacking off in front of each other. Most awkward pissing moment of my life.
Just saw some dude tumble down the stairs of the bar while leaving...fist pump...and then sprint down the road
A fair warning: I don't think a cop will let you off the hook just because your birthday is on New Year's Eve
I told her my hands felt like they touched the sun, never been that stoned before
I'd like to preapologize if you or your mom see me naked at some point this weekend.
Well I'm trying out this whole "not sleep with a stranger thing"
That's silly... just silly. And by silly I mean unrealistic.
I had to ask her to let go of my cock this morning so I could go home. She just kept saying "no, please, no..."
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