singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
All I remember from last night is puking up a box of cheeze-its and the building catching on fire.
Well, according to foursquare I checked in "@under the bushes" at 3:27am. This could explain some things.
I told my mom I had sex with him and even SHE was proud. Now that's saying something.
So you threw a sword at me last night
I honestly wish I could say that I was surprised.
Went to the strip club with my aunt. Do you know how hard it is to be a pervert in front of your female family members?
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
Yeah, he's passed out in my bathroom pantsless. Is it a faux pas to look at his penis?
If the river was whiskey, it would be the best river ever.
That's the ultimate walk-of-shame: running away from your own apartment and hiding in a McDonald's.
I just spent 3 hours in the back of an unmarked police cruiser. Best. Date. Ever.
Next time you have him paint you an outfit so you can do you walk the street naked TAKE A SHOWER BEFORE YOU GET IN THE BED. MY sheets look like like an acid trip
Maybe it’s too soon to casually tell the boss that I went to Tulsa for some dick last night
Remember when we got high off our ass and you talked me into running in place then punched me in the face and said it was a wall?
Ya, you were bleeding for an hour and a half
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
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