Dude, 1 prime defect in the snuggie- you can't fuck someone discreetly under a snuggie. No way no how
so i havent checked yet but im almost positive that my left ass cheek is bruised. any idea what happened last night.
what the fuck man? i was JUST texting you the same thing. FUCK
i got a blow job in the bathroom during intermission at the hockey game. i'm pretty sure i made Canada proud.
After all you put him through, I think it was only right that you saluted the bartender when you left.
I gave the naked guy in the hotel hall a pop tart. He stopped crying.
I can see why you broke up with her now... it was like having sex with a corpse.
Don't be offended. I can't even stand sleeping next to my dildo after I'm done, let alone a whole person.
nothing like a walk of shame in front of a cnn news crew to start the morning off right
I told him that he was essentially a very life-like dildo with a person attached so he needed to stop having feelings because it was getting annoying. He agreed.
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
The guy who was The Count on Sesame Street died this week too. Therefore, you should take multiple shots, count them, & go "ahh aaahh aaaahhh" after each one. I expect video...
Why do I have a bunch of cash....and your bra.
we gave you a glass of water and you just started yelling: TWO STRAWS, PATS AN ENGINEER HE'LL FIGURE IT OUT
Well yeah connect the two together, then you can lay down and drink.
Ladies and gentlemen, the only person I know who would keg stand in pearls and a bow.
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
Randomize