We should be called the Road Head Warriors
She actually said during sex "the only thing that would make this more perfect is if we were listening to Lenny Kravitz"
So, obviously, you had to give a fake number this morning.
Yes. Also, we may never be able to go back to that bar again.
we were watching porn and trying to copy the position they were doing now i think my hip is dislocated
Just saw a british exchange student take a flyer for free dental care. Yes.
Definitely got drunk and sent her a literal picture of my asshole. I titled it " you"
How do you have time to get laid so much in law school?
I like to set goals for myself. for example, he was my first libertarian
got woken up at 7:30 by a drunk girl asking me where she was... apparently she slept on my futon
she was in a cheetah costume
Is 10 pm too early to booty call a freshman?
She won't let me open the car door while we are on the highway so I can throw up outside. She deserves to have her car thrown up in.
Beautiful fucking linguistics Shakespeare, but youre still not doing that to my face
Its official, if she bites your dick through your jeans, ya'll go together. A lesson you shouldn't have to learn after the fact.
I'm not going to be your wingman while you are in the hospital.
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
The lady in the stall next to me just screamed "why are you so hairy!?" and "why can't you get any!?" to her vagina. WTF
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