thanks...oh and i got my period
told you
oh hush
I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
I just had a girl text me from knoxville "come see me. we'll go for drinks and I can make you breakfast"
how do you like your eggs?
over tits
he rolled over in his sleep, called me a hoe and then grabbed my crotch. some things never change, asleep or not.
i just sat down and hooked up with this girl. after she left i called over another girl and did the same. this happened about four more times and i never left my chair
I felt like a dog for all the times during sex that he said "good girl"
Im surprised putting the throwing knife "dartboard" next to the door didnt end up worse
There are 144 bottles of wine in my mother's pantry. She just shrugged her shoulders and said it was for the wine pong tournament on Christmas Day.
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
This is one of those times I wish I had a time machine so I could go back and punch myself in the face to make me realize what I need to do before it's too late
He won a jackpot and invited his ex girlfriend over to have sex on 5grand
Yeah, nothing like barfing into a grocery bag you just put dog shit into.
I'm glad you don't care about kids. That's one of your better qualities.
TJ is going to paint me in a Patriots Jersey he can paint you in an eagle jersey. Did this last year and got so much dick.
You and I both know it takes more than prescription narcotics to keep our family down. See you around ten, brother.
Randomize
