i wonder if detective benson from law and order takes those handcuffs home. i bet she does.
I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
how drunk are you?
What does that even mean anymore?
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
you know...the drug dealer i named my baby after.
Your like the Mozart of blow jobs, you make every other girl seem like cheesy elevator music.
and then he tried plucking my nose hairs. lines were crossed.
Im in search of the perfect penis, it would be unethical for me not to test run them.
Had "I should be in prison or dead" storytime at the bar. Found out James has done blow off a dead guy. Overwhelmed and speechless.
Dude she flew me 1000 miles down to see her, broke up with me 7 hrs after arrival, and kicked me out with a week left til I fly home. Thank god college taught me how to shack up
YOU CAN'T BASE A RELATIONSHIP OFF A PENIS
I LIKE HIS TONGUE TOO.
It's getting to the point where my ability to get dick pix during the work day is impressing even me. Take that, adulthood!
Dude!! Who the fuck glued Cheetos to my couch? Bastards!!
For now I'm a single mom monday-thursday and a drunk looking for dick the rest of the week
You chased a rabbit then knocked on a police car and asked the cop "if he saw where that little bastard went."
Randomize
