And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
my roommate left her license, credit card, and cellphone on her desk. I feel like this is a trap.
I feel like hell. The amount of black beans I found in my hair tells me I hit rock bottom
ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
he kept telling me how much his girlfriend would love me while we were making. why does tequila always do this to me?
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
Seriously, this apartment is covered in body glitter. This chick musta been a huuuuuge slut. How do you get it across every surface?
Do you have any forwarding contact info?
Dude that chick had a dog in her car. Like when she goes bar hoping so does roofus. He gaurds the car.
He's probably the biggest I've seen outside of the porn I vehemently deny watching and he asks if I think he's too small
That's crazy. Wow that lady must be fucked up
Yeah I hope she's okay.
I'm still going to fuck her husband but I do hope she's okay.
One of the finest moments in my life was when I was puking in between my legs as I was shitting, and thought to myself "hmm this shall be called shomiting."
I just met him at a place called the meat farm, Jesus be a shield.
She ripped her shorts off and yelled "VAGINA TIME!"
How are they?
Amazing! These new boobs are going to break blouse buttons and wedding vows!
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