I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
a girl just walked by me crying on the phone saying, "all I ever do is menstruate"
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
Ladystoner tip: if eyes are bloodshot, lime green eyeliner makes them appear less red. its basic artt.
I'll make a Jello mold of your face so everyone can get drunk off your face
I just learned a new drink. Sloppy Ninja. Half Saki Half Nyquil
I sold him an eighth while trippin balls wearin my girlfriends tutu and tube top. and i was talking about albinos the entire time
well, he defiantly picked the right guy to buy drugs from
How's dating the med student working out for you?
After we had sex last night he showed me where my spleen was.
A true anatomy project.
I've had more orgasms than showers this week.
mate iv just woke up in the garden. either help me inside or bring out my vodka
Do toy wanna orseer frim onedof tjose plaves? Sry textimg with globes on
Gloves*
Out of all the words to correct, you chose gloves??
There is a moment when you wake up with a butt plug in when you question your choices in life.
There is also a moment when you wake up in a kiddie pool of jello cubes where you question what the fuck you did last night. Are you still in the attic or did you go home.
It's taking all of my will power not to chug this margarita. This must be the life of an adult...
Like honey no, I’m getting groceries while pretending that having sexy talk with you is turning me on
Of course he’s dumb. He’s got a 9 inch dick! There’s not enough blood in his body for a big dick and a big brain. It’s science
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