doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
is it sad that whenever i need to spell "independent" i still sing that one rap song?
Jenna and Ryan are ranting and raving about child custody. MY VASECTOMY SMILES.
Random girl at this party just gave me a lap dance in a la-Z-boy. Night significantly improved.
And all I wanted you to do is stand there and sing who let the dogs out.
We will have to go big on the 4th! Nothing says independence like the impending doom of an ankle monitor
It's all fun and games until your AARP eligible neighbors end up blacking out in your yard at 5pm with a box of franzia. I'm feeling a great year ahead
I'm at the bar, forgot my pants. Everyone's over reacting
I may be going to Mexico. I just met a drug dealer at a strip club. Seems legit.
I can't help you right now because I'm shaving my feet...like a lady.
Sorry again for almost setting you on fire.
Never thought I'd see the day when I got assless chaps in the mail, and yet here we are...
not only did u rap a voicemail to me last night.... but it lasted so long that it cut you off so you called back to finish..... never do this again
Let's just say if my bucket list had "fngered in the middle of a club by a complete stranger while being sprayed by UV paint" then that is well and truly ticked off.
I never thought I'd be judging my neighbors sex lives before age 30 but here we are
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