why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
Just saw remains of her puke from last night on my pants.... thats got "Apology BJ" written all over it.
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
For some reason i am carrying prostate cancer brochures. i am nor used to drinking this early.
It's been two weeks and I still have carpet burns on my knees. Well done.
Wheres my essay?
You mean the vodka drenched shreds of paper taped all over the walls of the hallway?
If by "in control" you mean him showing-up to work wasted, calling a customer a "fuckstick," and getting fired on the spot? Then yes, he is.
I just yelled at a bunch of girl scouts for yelling "cookies" to loudly. That hungover
Just remember my house smells of thick cut bacon and I have a big dick.
the upside of dating someone over 21: he can buy me a pregnancy test AND a bottle of wine when he goes to cvs for me
Woke up on the couch with one cowboy boot on and a hat over my crotch. God bless texas.
Within the first 2 minutes of this morning, I found out the Lions lost on last play, and Scott Weiland died. I wont be in today.
Pretty good. Thinking about getting day drunk and filling out job applications so I don't hate myself as much
Apparently I promised everyone at the party I'd partake in various winter sports with them..
Randomize