i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
i just found a bag of weed behind my capital one card. i guess that's what's in my wallet.
We folded our dollar bills into airplanes. This really makes the strippers work for it. Like air miles.
Yeah the sex got weird after I said "who's your daddy?" and she actually moaned her dads name.
All I've accomplished this quarter is making Uno an acceptable drinking game.
He tricked me...the first song on his sex mix was trey songz but the rest were techno....i can't walk straight now
The night started going down hill when she shot the cashier in the face with the confetti gun we bought at 711.
i lost his rear view mirror, your phone charger, and my lesbian virginity. 21 isn't shaping up too well so far.
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
Why do I only have half my beard? My chin is so naked...
just filed my taxes drunk as balls. i may be going to jail.
And fyi howling is not an acceptable form of communication.
I got the job! The hiring manager is the sister of a guy I slept with so its like I'm a real adult now
they gave me money. the money smells like weed. also they gave me weed
Whoever was the bastard/bitch/genius who duct taped my keys to my dick so I wouldn't lose them. I hate you.
Randomize
