Bike broken, reschedule party till thursday:(
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
Almost peed between 2 cars...till I realized that it's daytime and I'm sober.
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
I literally need to be slapped with another cock just to notice it.
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
I was the last girl at the bar last night. It was like a battle royale between 10 guys.
You have not lived until you've seen your mother stumble into the house with one shoe on mumbling incoherently about tequila cupcakes.
Vagic. Defined as a kind of magic one has over a girl's vagina. Used in a sentence... he's an accomplished vagician.
So how do you explain to your boss that Siri called him mid sex?
She said my mask was creepy, took it off with her teeth, and proceeded to bite my neck. I love vampires.
I literally have a pirate chest of slutty clothing.
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
Bahahah I should. I’m the free range drunk girl who should clearly not be free range because who knows what kind of fuckery I would get into
Randomize
