dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
I dont understand how a fully grown man could convince himself that lime green crocks would look good on him.
I'm not inviting you over anymore if my cat keeps ending up in the freezer...
Been drinkin since 3, wearing a tutu, how could things go wrong
I don't know what happened last night but I woke up this morning with "wolf pack" tattooed on my knuckles.
He asked me If i had cheated on my boyfriend when I said no he said it's like he doesnt know me anymore
Okay, good. And if you have one of those portable strip poles that would be nice too.
He filled our room with little plastic cups of beer so the only way I could get out was by drinking them all.
Yeah, half my ass was burnt and I was missing a shoe. I'm blaming you for the shoe.
U offered to motor boat her and it somehow turned into u two going on a sunset cruise in Newport. At 3am.
Were you drinking last night?
Because typically I don't associate the phrase 'Go sleepy time' with sobriety.
i need to un-sleep with a few of those brothers before we ever go back to that house again. i'm serious. i will not be a fraternity groupie.
Woke up with a squirrel in my bed, how was your night?
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
How hot? Like... how many hemsworths?
Randomize
