dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
VODKAVODKAVODKAYESSSS
Only thing worse than going to work with a hangover is going to work with a hangover then realizing that u don't have to work that day
I worked so hard to shave everything last night. EVERYTHING. He WILL be answering my phone calls. Otherwise he's passing up awesome random birthday sex.
The fun I thought I would be having now when I was six is vastly different from what I am currently doing. Hurraaay sex and vicodin.
A beef tasting is not what I needed while hungover
She just told me she thinks she bruised her labia in class
Two dicks, one me.
Yoga's definitely paying off.
multiple people will be seeing my nips tonight. not mad about it at all
all I know is this drummer better stop eye fucking me while he plays cowbell. it is way too early for that.
I just masterbated to the Lets Get Ready To Rumble theme
dude wtf why are there forks in my wall
does "I AM MAGNETOOOO" ring any bells, because that was you for an entire hour last night
I think the hamburger goblin stole my cigarettes. I left my purse behind her table and they're not in it now.
Randomize