is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
When you're about to leave, tell him "bye." At that point, he should say something. If he doesn't say anything, well, our drinks were free and he gets a free make out with yours truly.
I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
Nothing says "I forgive you for puking on me during sex" like a Facebook add the next morning...
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
I just took my birth control with Redi-Whip. I'm that girl.
If the world ends now I want you to know I was on my favorite toilet fighting the good fight.
Only I could get hit on by homophobic straight guys in a drag bar.
you got in a fight with your imaginary friend last night when he didn't catch you after a surprise trust fall
Only I could go on a date with one guy, have a beer with a different guy and go home with the guy im trying to avoid. I have a talent or a problem.
We need a hype man... Like a DMX type dude to just up the ante constantly...
You gotta come over now. He is eating cupcakes while they are still in the foil.
No no no, work drunk and day drunk are totally different. I got drunk with a client and made a huge sale at 1pm. You are still in your PJs and jacking off.
If I had a dollar for every functioning brain cell you had I would owe someone a lot of money
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
Randomize
