We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
why is there a picture of someone wearing Tevas with socks taped on the wall?
Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
Would you like me to write a persuasive essay on how you should let me suck your dick?
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
sorry for throwing an entire water bottle of vodka at you. It was very wasteful
you fucked my boyfriend. margarita girls night will not fix this.
he referred to his penis as the bashful dwarf from snow white
Is that a tongue signal to get over there? That's how my two heads are taking it.
woke up in the back seat of my car with a naked chick and my brother tapping on the window. yup, what a night
mom how many of the songs from my childhood are mexican drinking songs?
all of them.
They way I see it is I've wasted 7 years of having these glorious tits. I only have about 3 good years left before idk kids or just gravity takes over and they don't look this nice so it's basically open season.
I woke up hugging my purse and I found a business card in my underwear. How?
By the time I realized I was watching a Danish porno with muppets it was already too late
I’ve officially bought the ticket for my future dick appointment 😂
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