bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
you just broke rule number 1. If you can't lift her up don't date her
Its only fair we share our golden vaginas with the world. It would be selfish if we didn't.
My "Week Of Not Checking Into OK Cupid So I Don't Hook Up With Another Fat Chick" lasted four hours. On the plus side, she was the smallest one yet.
Yeah I mean its Vermont, not like id be the first guy to trade pharmaceutical services for beer
I have a strict rule of what enters my vajay. It's either sparkly, or human. Anything else and I draw the line. Standards.
Eye surgery went well. Just can't believe it took getting lasers through my eyes to temporarily stop the vivid sex dreams I was having
My masturbation fantasy just had a wedding theme. I need new hobbies.
As its breast cancer awareness month, I'm going to do my part by making everyone aware of my breasts
2 things: 1) can you get hep from toilet water? And 2) do you know where we can get a new skillet for cheap?
Please tell me those aren't related.
I made rice.
Seriously I can't get a booty call for some baked goods.
Being in nursing school really pays off when your dealer tries to pass off naproxen as Percocet. Like I may have made a C in pharm but I aced the pain drug test
When Ben was deep throating pickles last night I actually reconsidered our relationship
I heard you ran into my sister lastnight. Do you remember making out with her and slapping my uncle?
If I'm able to walk tomorrow morning, I'm gonna be really disappointed with myself...
Randomize
