Right on... I dropped my chapstick
I blacked out
Can't talk. I'm at the Tulsa Sheriff's office with a bunch of rednecks. I bet I'm the only one that voted for Obama.
I bet you're the only one who could read the ballott.
I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
She's the only one so far who hasn't laughed at me naked.... I'm gonna marry her.
Selling Girl Scout Cookies outside bars for higher than retail value has got to be the most profitable idea. Ever.
I'm just here to guide your spirit, avoiding herpes is on you though
Im thinking about quitting weed for my dog
Water park on acid. THIS NEEDS TO HAPPEN!!
you were feeling the wall and when we asked you why, you just said "because I want to know who lived here before"
Boobs are out for the taking
Remember when you walked in on me sleeping INSIDE a pillowcase?
I'm gonna hop on that dick and ride it into the sunset
You now have the mental image of me flying off into the sunset with no pants
We peed on campus in the middle of the tailgate and then hit on a married cop that asked you to stop touching him
My roommate just yelled at me for coughing. I'd like to yell at her for doing lines off our counter last night.
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