Everytime I think about NYE, my gag reflex kicks in.
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
he just used "boss" and "boner" in the same sentence. I cant respond.
The doctor told me if I woke up with a broken foot and don't know how it happened, I might want to look into getting treatment.
I should probably just look up vagina pictures in the anatomy textbook. That always cheers me up.
All my money is going towards making my vagina hairless
Worth it.
I'm going to be an 8 year old girl down there foreverrrr #fountainofyouth
So this bar tattoo not looking that great now
Finally had sex in the new kitchen. Burnt the hamburgers and hit myself in the face with the freezer door. Worth it.
Idk I'm sorry it's weird to ask for testimonials on your penis
Did I leave the house with out a shirt or socks?
Yea, you said you didn't need them cause she was going to take them off anyways and that it would "save time".
Yeah. Still not happy that my prof saw a picture of my vag.
He said I was really mad at him on Friday. Dude I fell asleep in all my clothes and shoes, with my flashlight on, on my phone... I could have been mad at the wall. It wasn't my classiest day.
I woke up knowing I have nowhere to be today except parties and it was glorious and I am so happy
I got bit by a peacock. That's how hard shit went down last night.
I slapped a guy during sex last night because he moaned the wrong name. Then I remembered I gave him a fake name. Sorry bro.
Randomize
