No, I'm only going to drink half my paycheck. That's the responsible thing to do.
at least the person I hooked up with donates to charity, the shirt I was wearing this morning was his relay for life shirt.
So roofie roulette was a success but I'm a little worried that the 2 who got the tainted beer still haven't contacted anyone...
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
I'll be on pinterest all night planning crafty things to do with my cats in 10 years.
Just rinsed and put my styrofoam cup of noodles in the dishwasher. I need to be not hungover ASAP
we were sitting in the kitchen and you kept biting my shoulder saying "itll all be over soon"
lost her for two hours. she was banging a russian guy in her car in the parking lot. he told her she was majestic.
Explaining that I bought them at a strip club gift shop with my friend didnt make the furry handcuffs seem less weird
I'm sorry your Amazon says buttplugs now
Just checking to make sure you weren't kidnapped, pregnant or watching Fox News.
Swimming turned traumatic when grampas shorts slipped off..
Haha. I found pics last week of me getting motorboated by a girl while i was taking a shot. Hahaha in my wedding dress. Classy
last night you made out with a 19 year old on a bar and i woke up with a swede in my bed. lets just say that never happened.
Had a job interview today. Walked into the room and said "IT'S GO TIME, BITCHES".
Randomize