I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
If I ever start a band I'm gonna name it "Nancy Reagan's Vagina"
The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
Just saw all the pictures from the party. I'm wearing a different shirt in every single one.
So roofie roulette was a success but I'm a little worried that the 2 who got the tainted beer still haven't contacted anyone...
You were walking around in your swim suit, an open robe, snow boots and a death grip on that handel of captain morgan.
OMG THE KID WHO TRIED TO MAKE OUT AT THE BAR WITH ME IS SITTIG NEXT TO ME IN THE AIRPORT. WHY LIFE WHY???
At one point, he came in to give her a pep talk, and then after he left, she just kept whispering his name into the toilet between heaves.
No man we're leaving now. The party will probably be busted soon. O and a bitch started throwing knives around the place, like real actual knives.
I guess I'm just gonna have to learn to live with the fact that I'm the guy who takes his pants off at the party and tries to start an orgy
wait did i hook up with someone in mcdonalds last night?
he sent me the greatest dick pic I've ever received.
he actually took the time to cut a fingertip off of a glove then put it on his dick like a beanie. he called it hipster dick.
I don't remember how I broke my nose last night, but I woke up with dried blood everywhere. Also, you should tell that guy how you feel.
Hi you snuggled with me in my bed in a maid outfit
i told him the only way i'd fuck him was if he saved me during the zombie apocolypse and took me to a tastefully decorated yet impenetrable hideout.
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