i wish there were pregnant emoticons
I thought this kinda shit only happens to ugly people
i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
jusi got death stares at taco bell because I asked if Denise was working.
2am update: i think I'm in Mexico but I found a dennys. Everyone but this cute family of 4 is speaking Spanish. Cute family of 4 is helping me out.
Food Network. Taking bong rips everytime we want to eat. BOBBY FLAY.
pretty sure if my vagina had a mouth, it would have been smiling afterwards.
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
Do you think wearing a shirt that says I like penis is too much for tonight?
Yo if you blacked out last night, careful going through your purse. There's cocaine in a lollipop wrapper.
Where are you on a scale from one to wasted?
Like alphabetically I'd say a v
I'm still drunk dear. I just woke up 3 feet from the front door with 20 dollars worth of taco bell in my hands.
"fuck it, let's do moonshine" shouldn't be in ANYONE'S vocabulary.
If he's dating my cousin now, do I have to erase the pictures of his dick off my phone? Ugh, morals.
Randomize
