As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
well apparently i yelled MY VAGINA WAS ANNIHILATED and his whole family heard
How long is it safe to eat only Hot Pockets and Popsicles?
At this point I feel like i'm never going to be sober, and it's frightening
I've been living off of popsicles and broth.
Yeah but I get laid and I know. He drank toilet water last night and he doesn't know about that either. Still makes me happy though.
WHY ARE YOU SMOKING WEED WHEN YOU JUST HAD A STROKE. AND MORE IMPORTANTLY WHY ARE YOU DOING IT WITHOUT ME.
Your friend, the one I told I would brush his teeth with my tongue, what's his name again?
I think my Halloween costume this year will be made entirely of pillows and I'll be Marshmellow girl or Kirby. That way I'm comfortable, warm, and if I fall over drunk I'm safe.
last night we were hooking up when all the sudden he just murmured "mm blonde". i don't know what to think about this situation.
who knew my inner goddess was such a whore
2:34, make a wish! I wish I wasn't on acid at Planned Parenthood. What's yours?
I spanked her so hard I woke up Grandma
I complemented his smile, he sends me a dick pic. Seriously?
Bring shot glasses to the final. Don't ask questions.
Randomize
