I woke up this morning under my fitted sheet and my legs through the sleeves of my sweater.
I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
I may be the first guy in history to get dome while watching An Extremely Goofy Movie.
Don't text me when you know I'm doing lines on my phone
nothing says new school year like ambulances and police road blocks.
U shoulda just taken her to a stall and banged her and let me watch the game. Some friend u r.
Tonights theme there is the 7 deadly sins. Greed, envy, sloth, gluttony, sluttiness, fellatio and vodka.
she cried into her fur with two handfuls of money- she was the physical manifestation of white girl problems
got into a verbal altercation with Luke Harangoty last night over a table. Called him a cross-eyed fuck and got the table.
Like please, take your microdick and try to stick it someplace else. It is not welcome in my world.
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
I was orgasming and dying of laughter at the same time. I think I've found the One.
I went to a party last night....I stole all of their ornaments and the toaster oven.
I sent him a blank text because I didn't want to "drunk text" him.
never let me tell the bartender to cut me off, i basically told on myself
Randomize
