Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
respond to me or i'm telling everyone that you inserted a vodka soaked tampon into your anus
he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
he told me he wanted to get "words" tattooed on his penis so he could say hes always putting words in my mouth..
Her name is Sherri and her sister's are Brandy and Champagne. Of course I want to meet her parents.
If only we could all 3 say fuck school to be stoner flight attendants
We turned on "find my friends" and watched her progress. Got concerned when she didn't move for an hour on Adelaide, turned out a booty call was made, then she went back to the bars.
I'm so high. Midnight pancake breakfast in bed
I should start prefacing bondage with girls saying "I know you've read 50 Shades, but there is a 33% you're gonna freakout and go home, while I jerk it alone"
This guy is like Don Jon! Im over here this weekend and at least four times I've heard porn on his phone thru the bathroom door.
He asked me who my new boyfriend was and I showed him a picture of my sex toys.
I'm having shoppers remorse over a dildo
I was so high I could TASTE the fillings in my teeth
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
she prefaced telling me she was pregnant with "houston, we have a problem"
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