I'm taking a dump and eating a fortune cookie and it said "Force it to be successful"
I really want to sleep with her friend. I'm hoping our casual sex relationship will somehow lead to that.
I just had to explain to the pharmacy cashier that the Plan B and thank you notes I was buying were not related.
u kept pointing at random guys and making quacking or mooing sounds.
Who is he, asking me if im dtf without a question mark
...
after the shots you kept on yelling "this is for the dreamers"
AT THIS RATE YOU WILL HAVE FUCKED MORE OF MY CLOSE FRIENDS THAN I HAVE PEOPLE PERIOD BY VALENTINE'S DAY.
People...there is no better feeling in the world than finding out via Google that your ex has a warrant out for his arrest. No better feeling.
She only fucks to metal. I don't know whether to marry her or run for the hills.
But seriously I don't know. I haven't seen her since I gave her back her 3 blind mice stick, and she just started hitting everybody with it.
Me my naked body. You bring the paints. I expect to be a panther by game time Sunday.
What do I get.
Panthers win you get to fuck the paint off me.
I'll never lecture you, go get that dick baby girl make momma proud,I didn't raise no quitter
So about that you can bill me for the chair but it was David's idea to jump from the window sill into the washer with "clothing pillows of cloudiness" to land on to get ahold of him you have to phone his mother
I just talked to her she really hates you like a lot
part of it says your brother mayyyy have put his lips on my vagina
It's a shame I've been hooking up with him for 6 months and he still doesn't know my real name.
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