In these economic times, linking arms taking tequilla shots with your boss as an underage girl is the best job security I can think of
my dad just encouraged me to do a kegstand
how hairy? two words: wookie tits
No, you can still breathe under the balls.
we convinced you the moon was a planet...again
No gym. Sooooo hung over. Just puked up the water I drank and it still has ice cubes in it.
It was that same situation where "cuddling on the floor" was actually just code for "rough shameful hate sex" hahaha.
I'm about one sudden movement away from being able to cross "throw up in a fortune 100 company's bathroom" off my bucket list.
I had a dream last night where I used the marginal product rule to figure out how much more hangover I got per sip of four loko, econ is taking over my life...
The cops wrote boobs in the police report. ...vandalism is our calling
I feel like I should be having more sex dreams of my boyfriend than his sister..
Nothing showshows the government the middle finger more than spending your tax refund on drugs
Like I could say no to two hot people already naked and fucking. Please. I'm not made of stone.
Twice?!
She said my mask was creepy, took it off with her teeth, and proceeded to bite my neck. I love vampires.
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
Randomize
