my drunk step mom just informed me my dad likes reverse cowgirl. Please god kill me.
3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
I was actually kinda bummed my STD test came back negative.
That would have been proof he'd slept with the stripper. Lame.
Somehow after we left in 3 different cars to all go to different places we still all ended up in the emergency room
You started a dance party so that you could steal their vodka and shouted "sailors out!"
I wish my brain had a "congrats you just defeated the munchies" notification!
I may have to steal the boat sober, but I feel that would be harder to explain.
We took it as we must go to waffle house or else we will upset the gods.
Well there is another shower in Nov. So I have three months to figure out how to get some drunk space fucking. May need some of your mead
So if I get kidnapped from my office and go missing for a few days does that count against my vacation days and do I still get paid?
In the middle of our bar crawl last night we stopped to pet dogs at a dog park. who would let a drunk person bet play with their dog???
As soon as I got there, you appeared out of no where, yelled "they're giving away free cigarettes!" in my face and then disappeared and I didn't see you the rest of the night.
And thanks! There are perks to polyamory. And birthday orgies are one of them
I don't work there anymore. If they had Prince themed dildo parties i never would have quit
condom fairy costume came in handy...we were making out in my living room and he wanted it so i took a condom off the costume and we did it right there...with my tutu still on....
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