tell her no need for introductions. and that you've read about her on the back of toilet doors.
Deffinety need to stop having sex on the beach just took a dump and it was mostly sand
I have realized now that neither the top nor bottom of a bunk bed is safe for sex....
WHY. COME BACK. TRAPPED WITH ROOMMATE AND FALCON. SAVE ME. I HAVE HUMMUS.
He's sitting in his room on Facebook with nothing but a pillow covering his crotch. I can't help you at the moment.
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
Blonde girl lying face-down, passed out next to my bed, walls are covered in guacamole. College is looking excellent.
you should probably know that there's a naked dude in your window
i wouldn't normally say anything but you seem to not be there
If my penis could make facial expressions, it would constantly have a smile on.
Goddamn it Peter ur the only person i know who can make going down on a girl a competition.
She won. Twice.
It's like the first time your mom catches you masturbating. We both know what she saw. We're just not talking about it...
I asked him if we were going to get arrested for doing it in the bar parking lot. "Absolutly not" said the guy getting the blow job...
That awkward moment when you are on your way to ICU and the only sympathy gift you can think of is beer and whiskey
Black magic does not go near my vagina, it's a rule
I kinda wanna drive through the Gator bar parking lot and seeing if my panties are on they ground, they should be right next to my pride...
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