Midget sex pt 2 tonight
Holy cold harsh reality of sobriety batman
so then you were screaming "GIVE ME KELVINS!" and heating things up in the microwave and no one knew what you wanted
I just got my poem back from the prof, there's a sticker of a girraffe on it and it says "you're awesome!" ... How can this even be considered real college?!?
Typical Sunday afternoon purchase of condoms and a helium tank.
What I'm trying to say is, that time you chained me to my dresser and made me beg for it was incredibly romantic.
Is it inception if it feels like another uterus is going to burst out of my current uterus?
Impressive. I've never gotten straight denied and then chased the guy naked out of my own apt. I'll remember that next time.
We watched game of thrones, broke up and I drove away blasting ridin solo while he dougied
That's not a current picture, because if you look deep enough into my eyes you can still see morals. Not these days.
Yes. I masterbate to Harry Potter. It's what our generation does.
I JUST BROKE A NAIL MASTURBATING. WTF I could even enjoy my orgasm bc now I'm gonna have to spend $50 on my nails.
It's probably not a good thing when it isn't even 6:30 and I've already drank an entire bottle of wine. By myself. I'm watching Spice World and I just bought 2 Spice Girls albums off itunes.
Make that 3 Spice Girls albums.
i dunno dude, he took his shirt off and is rubbing jello shots on himself. i think he's done
He really is. Owns his own house and has more than one towel!
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