so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
P.S. theres no milk for breakfast, but theres plenty of beer or red wine. you decide.
I may or may not be drunk driving a golf cart. Vegaaaassssssss.
I wake up every morning and wish that I didn't have to wear a bra
He called me a "functional alcoholic" like its a bad thing.
Sometimes I wonder how different my life would be if I didn't share a weekly margarita with my mom since i was 12
Things I have that belong to you: shorts, headband, bra, purse, chinese food, vodka, and blood on my jeans. Happy homecoming.
I gave you a lap dance in a bowling alley... And I was Fine?
You got me so high that I almost couldn't leave my house for a bar because there was nothing to lean against on the way there
I just asked her to come in through the window, this pretty much solidifies the whole fuck-buddy thing...
im on the hungover til tuesday pabst blue ribbon diet
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
holy shit the woman im hooking up with is closer to my moms age than my own
I really regret not asking “like a cupcake” when you asked me to eat your ass
Get over your kidney infection all ready. You have been sober for too long.
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