You dirty dirty liar I like the way you twitter
fun fact: cucumber in vinegar with pepper = best ever high snack
i just heard the ice cream truck outside while mid-masturbation. i stopped and considered running outside to buy one.
You kicked in the door when she was blowing him. You dont remember do you?
You should get a handy in the street again, just to prove you've still got it.
We are casual work acquaintances that occasionally fuck when the urge strikes. CWATOFWTUS. I know FWB rolls off the tongue better but it is what it is.
I think the main reason you were throwing up so much was the quart of soap you chugged trying to burp bubbles. you came close
They just called to see if he wanted to come in at 2am for overtime. He's trashed. He literally carried on a 10 minute convo with his boss about woodchucks. As in the animal
People are yelling about how much they want you here.
I'm going to change, vomit up my mexican food to save the trouble later, and then come meet you. Thrilled.
how many thumbs am i supposed to have at one time
you found the shrooms didnt you
he just cleaned his wound with pinnacle whipped
Where are you and why are you fighting with a bird?
I just let my boss bend me over his desk and spank me. I think that is some sort of American dream.
I found a bar with Metallica and a fire eater. I'm home
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
Randomize
