Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
He wouldnt get hard, then started talking about his ex wife. I literally rolled over and started to cry
I'm totally counting that party when he kept putting his hands down my pants as a date.
TOMORROW NIGHT CAN I HOLD YOU LIKE A BABY
how did my horoscope know i was too hungover to operate a stove.
Well when you get back to your computer, there's a nice explanation of pansexuality on your Skype.
I don't think I'm allowed to have Burger King. What if i just chew for taste and not actually consume. Like a wine connoisseur for fast food
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
no, I didn't go in the end. Too hungover and hot, plus Star Wars is on so obviously I'm having a naked day.
Leaving my wallet at work and not going out to drink tonight...SIGN FROM THE UNIVERSE.
Halloween is the end of the singles holidays they don't start again until st. Patrick's day we better get wifed up or it's going to be a long winter lol
Sooooooo this guy just asked me if I'd be interested in a threesome... I'm considering bc I would get to hang out with his dog afterwards.
we just got sex advice from a midget. You better fucking get here.
It's an interesting experience to pee while a bird meows at you.
You need to get out of the house more
Next time I say "i forgot to eat dinner, oh well" before drinking STRAP ME TO A CHAIR AND FORCE FEED ME BEFORE ALLOWING ME TO CONSUME BOOZE
Randomize
