I just walked into the kitchen and my dad was having this uber serious convo
With himself
What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
just woke up in the hotel with gummi bears all around me and someone took the tv
we took the tv and as for the gummi bears don't eat them you put em in her vagina
i'm moving back early just in case the freshmen need a tour of the school
oh right the one that ends on your bed
Is there a technical name for reverse cowgirl? I'm trying to maintain a little dignity with my mother here
There's a middle eastern man wearing a cow costume with tequila coming out of his udders, but I'm not sober enough to feel uncomfortable with it.
Was last night real? Did I lick your forehead while you laid in between my legs while we laid next to your boyfriend?
She did my hair, then ate me out. Switching teams was an awesome decision.
Note to self: do not ride giant beanbag chair down stairs.
The instructions say refer to specific course material, but I'm in no mood to reopen this awful book that caused me so many lost hours of drinking.
Yeah FUCK THAT NOISE
Its official, if she bites your dick through your jeans, ya'll go together. A lesson you shouldn't have to learn after the fact.
Man i fell asleep on a random persons porch on the way home and woke up to the family banging on the windows trying to wake me up
I need a beard to bite.
Yeah I knew you'd like him. He's emotionally and physically self destructive.
We would have so much to talk about!
Randomize
